You are in high school.
You dropped out of high school.
You graduated within the last 5 years.
You live on your own.
You live within 20 minutes of your best friend.
You live within 20 minutes of the last person you kissed.
You live within 20 minutes of your ex.
You have hugged someone in the last 48 hours.
You have been to the movies within the last week.
You have had 3 or more boyfriends/girlfriends just this year.
You have been a designated driver.
You have broken merchandise and not paid for it.
You have played strip poker.
You are Catholic.
You are atheist.
You recycle regularly.
You are a brunette.
You have dated a blonde.
You are friends with a redhead.
You are taller than your mum.
You have a bank account.
You’ve written a check for less than $5.
You have visited the Statue of Liberty.
You have visited the Eiffel Tower.
You have visited Big Ben.
You have visited the Colosseum.
You have visited The Great Wall of China.
You have never been out of the country.
You have been a waiter/waitress.
You own a Bible.
You own something with a Pentagram on it.
You have used a Ouija Board.
You have been a witch for Halloween.
You have been a zombie for Halloween.
You have been a Disney character for Halloween.
You don’t celebrate Halloween.
You have your belly button pierced.
You have your tongue pierced.
You have your eyebrow pierced.
You have a Monroe piercing.
You have your nose pierced.
You have an ankle tattoo.
You have a wrist tattoo.
You have a back tattoo.
You have no tattoos.
You have more than 5 tattoos.
You straighten your hair.
You have worn a dress in the last 3 days.
You live somewhere that gets snow.
You celebrate Hanukkah.
You were at your own house last New Year’s.
You were at a bar last New Year’s.
You slept through last New Year’s.
You have worked on Christmas Eve.
You have worked on Christmas.
You have been told ‘I love you’ by someone today.
You were told by someone who’s not family.
You slept in your own bed last night.
You are dating the last person you kissed.
You regret kissing the last person you kissed.
You enjoyed your last kiss.
You are wearing a necklace right now.
You are wearing something red.
You are wearing something blue.
You are wearing something purple.
Your phone number ends with an even number.
You have kissed the last person you called/texted.
You are currently listening to music.
You are waiting for something.
You don’t like seafood.
You have eaten deer sausage.
You have given a complete stranger your phone number.
You have been hit on at work.
You have been hit on by someone more than 20 years older than you.
You have been whistled at.
You were creeped out by it.
You are a good speller.
You are very punctual.
You were dating someone in December of 2008.
You are still dating that person.
You have cheated on someone.
You have been cheated on.
You have been on a cruise ship.
You have camped out in your own backyard.
You are wearing something that doesn’t belong to you.
You are a Pisces.
You are an Aquarius.
You are a Leo.
You are a Capricorn.
You have Polish heritage.
You have Japanese heritage.
You have Israeli heritage.
You have German heritage.
You have Portuguese heritage.
You have French heritage.
You have Norwegian heritage.
You have Korean heritage.
You were born in May.
You were born in June.
You were born in October.
You wonder what will happen when you die.
You are afraid of the dark.
You write in all capital letters.
You have been told you have nice handwriting.
You have had a song written for you.
You have had a picture drawn of you.
You have curly hair.
You are wearing a watch.
You are wearing flip flops.
You wouldn’t date someone who smoked.
You know someone with the same birthday as you.
You are a morning person.
You are a night owl.
You slept in past 10 am today.
You have big plans for next weekend.
You are thinking of someone right now.
Your job is stressing you out.
You don’t have a job.
You have never had a job.
You were fired from your last job.
You know sign language.
You will usually try something at least once.
You have been swimming in the last month.
You are pessimistic by nature.
You have taken a ballet class.
You have taken karate.
You have taken gymnastics.
You wish on shooting stars.
You wish at 11:11.
Your birthday has already come this year.
You have been in a relationship that lasted longer than a year.
You ended your last relationship.
Your ex ended your last relationship.
You aren’t over your ex.
You have gone after someone you knew was bad for you.
You have let someone use you.
You are engaged.
You are married.
You are divorced.
You have a child.
You were/are a teenage mom.
You are an otaku.
You are a cosplayer.
You were named after someone.
You like your name.
Your last drink was water.
You have visited somewhere said to be ‘haunted’.
You have skipped school just because you didn’t feel like going.
You have taken medicine when you ‘feel a headache coming on’.
You are self-conscious about your body.
You have a hangover.
You have a pet fish.
You have had a Jehovah’s Witness show up at your house.
You live on a farm.
You live in a trailer.
You have godparents.
Your parents are still married.
You have step-siblings.
You are the oldest.
You are adopted.
You have a twin.
You don’t want kids.
You want more than four kids.
You have a bad temper.
You have made out with a complete stranger.
You usually make the first move in an intimate situation.
You have worked with a Kayla.
You have gone to the movies with a Jared.
You have hugged a Lexie.
You have held hands with a Marcus.
You have dated a Rachel.
You have kissed a David.
You have ridden in a car with a Nicole.
You have had class with a Patrick.
You have gone out to eat with a Chloe.
You know a Kyle in the military.
You are related to a Julie.
You have gotten drunk with a Brent.
You can voice-act.
You have broken your arm.
You have had to get stitches on your face.
You have had an MRI.
Your fingernails are painted.
Your fingernails are painted black.
You like to read.
You like to cook.
You like to draw.
You like to sing.
You can play an instrument.
You keep a lot of secrets from people.
You don’t think people would accept you if they really got to know you.
You don’t trust people easily.
You borrowed something you really need to give back to someone.
You drive a car older than a 2002.
You have lost a friend you never thought you would. :(
You know a child who died of cancer. :(
You know a teenager who died in a car wreck. :(
You have done something illegal in the past 24 hours.
You have cut your hair in the last week.
You wear glasses.
You have been pulled over for speeding.
You love to drive with the windows down.
Your favorite season is Autumn.
Your favorite color is orange.
Your favorite animal is a dolphin.
You last rode in a car with a relative.
You last rode in a car with a girl.
You last rode in a car with the person you are dating.
You regularly watch Asian dramas.
You love Chinese food.
Your best friend is older than you.
You have to go to school/work tomorrow.
You answered every question truthfully.
today’s investment: hm….tough one. Oh! I know! Telling a coworker that yes I would help them even though it was already 6 pm and I wanted to go home.
Reading Yobgorgle to the kids (not yet, but soon)
Weekend’s investment: Supporting a family function. Working OT on Saturday.
Today’s investment: Going to work. Coming home from work, dusting off my bike, and riding 4.7 mi on the trail!
4/2 investments: Um…… i intended to lift weights. Does that count?
4/3 investments: Worked. All friggin’ day. Yes, it counts! Plus, playing with, and reading to the littl’un: Yobgorgle by Daniel Pinkwater. Oh, also a lovey-dovey phone call to the wifey at lunchtime :)
4/1 Investments: 1 hour walking neighborhood and trail. Completely weeded front-of-house landscaping in prep for mulch on 4/21. Reused wayward “grass clumps” from aforementioned landscaping to fill in part of the hole in backyard from where cherry tree was removed a couple years ago. “Family Movie” time spent with fambly (hence the name). Anti-investments: pretty much everything else, including mowing the lawn (chork!).
Interestingly enough, not one single “April Fools!” prank from any of the chilluns.
…and why not? Been researching for months and months about “making
the switch to passive income streams” or “Be like me! Make money while
you vacation, and while you sleep!” or “I completely quit my cushy six
figure jeeeoreeeayyrrb to follow my bliss, and all i took was this
eight hundred and fifty three step plan that I made all by myself!”
and they proceed to show a hand-drawn but very concise goal-setting
diagram that completely maps out (construction sites, traffic jams,
and all) their path to lifelong bliss through “gettin’ paid what they
LOVE to do” etc etc.
And I came to a realization. Everyone, and I mean *E*V*E*R*Y*O*N*E, no
matter how much they seem to have “made it” etc, is searching. For
something. Most don’t know what, and many don’t bother to try and find
out. For the extremely fortunate (and exceedingly rare) few, they find
it. AND it pays the bills! W00t! Ok, so that wasn’t so much my
realization. But this is.
Any “one thing” - going on a diet, winning the lottery, getting in a
car crash - won’t make a lasting change or effect in one’s life. Sure
it may cause you to be able to totally rock your 10 year reunion with
your newly svelte figure, or it may lavish you with cold hard cash, or
it may break every pathetic bone in your body…. But how many dieters
gain it all back, and then some? Statistically speaking? ALL. How many
lottery winners are immediately beset by ceaseless scam artists,
swindlers, and gold-diggers? Statistically speaking? ALL How many car
crash victims come back from adversity, beyond all doctors
expectations and force themselves to learn to walk again?
Statistically speaking? Well, not ALL but you get the picture.
I am beginning to realize just how pathetically dense I am and how
long it takes me to learn. No lasting good is brought about unless one
changes the THINGS THEY DO EVERY DAY (and learns how to appreciate
what they already have, which is a discourse for another day). And
that is bloody difficult, nigh on impossible. So I, being the
cheapskate moneygrubber that I am, think I may have finally hit upon
an approach that will help me to make those daily changes. And that
is: investment. The way I look at it, if I can simply change this high
level “filter” in my mind to try and make EVERY SINGLE THING I DO an
investment that yields immediate, or mid term, or long term benefit,
perhaps I can begin to, ever so slowly, break most of my lazy and
simply rote habits that don’t contribute to “the greater
good” (another concept for discourse at a future date).
I have no fancy, laid out plan to display to the world, by which they
can hold me mercilessly accountable. I have no PR or marketing machine
to tell Al Roker on the Today show that I am setting out on my walk
across the nation. I have no preset goals (a mistake, many in the self-
improvement world would say). Heck, I don’t even have an opt-in email
list or Twitter feed to announce to my peeps what I am doing. I figure
I’ll just maybe try and keep a running tab on this here modest Tumblr,
as to what my daily investments are. Maybe it’ll last a month? A year?
Three days? More likely.
So, today, this morning from 8 AM to 8:45 AM, I made my first
“investment”: a 35 minute rep of weightlifting on my home gym, and 360
excruciating seconds on my bike trainer.
Hey, you fry! Get off my lawn!